Life's Lessons

Life's Lessons... that I have learned...

1. I am not a big fan of the holidays... ba humbug.

2. I am a morning person, either like it or leave me the hell alone.

3. Do not interrupt me during the last 10 minutes of my tv show.

4. Why is it that the only time anyone wants to talk to me is when I am either on the phone, trying to sleep, or watching the end of a good show?

5. No, no cats NEED to eat breakfast at 4:30 in the morning. You can wait until I get up at 5am... or eat the dry food...

6.Why is it that the garbage can sit outside the backdoor and 3 people walk past it, but no one can grab the little yellow handles and take it to the garage (which you also walk past)???

7. As long as I can pull my hair back into a clip, it does not have to be washed every day.

8. If I don't have to go anywhere, my pajamas are good enough to stay in, even if we do have company!

9. I love my son - I wouldn't trade him for the world... but I would consider loaning him out for a while...

10. Why do I have to repeat myself several times? It is selective hearing or do you truly need a hearing aide??

11. I don't decorate for the holiday. My son and his grandma do that. I am so not into them anymore!

12. Working retail has totally killed the holiday spirit for me! I can live without them... 

13. I do love my family (with the exception of some days) and enjoy the time we spend together... and sometimes that is more than enough time!

14. When I get home at night, please let me get my shoes and coat off before hitting me with everything.

15. Can I please use the bathroom in peace? I really don't need to share that time with 3 cats and a child talking through the door.

16. Why is it that the bathroom can be empty for hours, UNTIL I decide to soak in a hot bubble bath?

17. Give me a pack of Oreos and a glass of milk... and leave me alone!

18. Cheese filled pretzel bites... I can make a full three-course meal of those.

19. Going outside in my pajamas is not unusual. If you don't like it - don't look!

20. I have no room in my king size bed for anyone but me... my eight pillows... 6 teddy bears... and 3 real-life cats with claws... so go sleep on the couch.